it's 2 am and i'm cursin your name

so since i'm still a kindergartener at heart we're going to have story time. i feel like i've been posting too many lyrics and far too few words of my own design. also, i had previously agreed with myself that at some point when i felt okay again, i'd tell this story. so here we go. 


once upon a time there was a girl and she didn't believe in love in any of it's forms. but her poor skeptical heart was in for quite a jolting wake-up call. it was just her sophomore year and she was only looking to have a fun time and make a few friends. she became really chummy with a couple of fine young men. it wasn't long until she realized she was falling for her bestest friend. her mind said, "oh please no, this is a mistake." and then her heart said, "shush you. didn't you see that boys eyes?"


and so her heart liked away. for a good long while that heart liked that boy. the heart loved the feeling of flying whenever he spoke, or the fluttering sensation whenever he'd look their way. but boy, did that heart end up regretting it. the day finally came when the mind looked down in pity and whispered to the aching organ, "i told you so."

then the heart was mad, and horrified, and oh so hurt. the girl could not allow herself to love him with her heart any more, so it became the mind's job to defend the boy. Heart cried out for revenge. "he deserves to feel this pain! i want someone to hurt him the way that i hurt!" but Mind said, "no. you don't know him like i do" and together they remembered every conversation the girl had ever had with him. they remembered every word, every touch, every text, every smile - they remembered everything.


and with a sigh, heart picked up all her broken pieces and the girl kept loving the boy even though she was in shambles. "he'll change, you'll see." she would sigh to herself each night, and it became her lullaby.


so the girl kept waiting and hoping, and the heart kept loving and missing, and the mind kept remembering and forgiving, and together as a team they held on to that boy with all the strength they could muster.

but even the strongest of wills wants for wear after a little while. so when a new boy came along that made the mind and heart feel okay again, they held a private conference with the girl and considered letting go of something that seemed so hopeless. 


but they had made it so long and held on for all that they were worth. do you just walk away from something that means so much to you?
is it possible to love two people at once?